That makes them quick to react with anger, fear, or anxiety.In a new relationship, it can be very overwhelming and leave the other person wondering where so much unwarranted emotion stems from.
On any given day they can be angry, sad, guilt-ridden, or have an enormous amount of relationship anxiety.
Never allowing themselves to become comfortable, you typically have no idea the things that lie underneath their smile. Just 34, we had four small children, and the youngest was only 12-months-old.
If you are ten minutes late, it is just ten minutes to you, but to someone who is immersed in fear and anxiety, their head has already pictured you lying dead in a ditch somewhere. Responsible for the fight or flight in our species, it is that feeling you get that makes you need to react.
You literally feel like you are going to jump out of your skin.
So, when they do let the crazy out, it is very confusing and often misunderstood.
Needing a place to displace their anger, it is not unusual for them to explode on the people they love most and trust.They would not like anyone because it just reminds them that their daughter/son is gone. When you promise to love someone until the day you die, the promise doesn’t end when they are gone. The person left here on earth is conflicted about where their heart should lie. There are also times when the pain is so great you wish that it had been you instead of them.You feel guilty when you date someone else and feel as if you are disrespecting your ex’s memory. There is something guilt-provoking about being the survivor. Guilt is a very difficult thing to have follow you around until you find a way to forgive yourself or move on. If there are children that have been widowed too, it can be like a family unit bleeding in unison.Having limited capacity for memories, we refuse to make them murky with the insignificant day-to-day things that used to bug us. The ex-in-laws may treat you coldly, or not like you entirely because they feel like you are taking their child’s place.All those things we disliked are suddenly the things we miss most, making the dead spouse “perfect.” For the person who dates the widower, it can be hard always to feel like you aren’t measuring up. Try not to take it personally; it has nothing to do with you.Like a cup filling over, you may become the recipient of it, and it is very hard to reign it in once it is let out.