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You can take this admission as a sign that he's not the right one after all.

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Though you may have used that word casually — when what you really meant to say was you "believe" it to be so based on lots of reliable evidence — I want to encourage you to be very intentional about what you base this conviction on.

Feelings alone won't carry you in marriage when things get difficult. those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this," 1 Corinthians b).

Assuming you do have evidence that the two of you are a good match for marriage — things like the witness of your family and friends, the blessing of your pastor and faith community, a shared commitment to God's will for your lives as a couple, etc.

— then I am mightily encouraged by how he responded to his sin.

Ultimately, you have to decide if you can forgive him and then move forward without constantly looking back to the sins of his youth.

We know that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Thankfully, we have a remedy for that sin — scarlet letters aren't designed for believers.

As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him; Now the test is if he's walking according to 2 Timothy , which says, "Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart." One of the issues you could talk through in that context is your grief over your unrealized expectations as well as what it means to forgive and move forward, restored, together.

If you need the name of a biblical pre-marital counselor or counseling program, feel free to call our counseling department at Focus on the Family for some recommendations.

With numbers like that, it's hard not to wind up dating someone who hasn't waited for sex, even if you have.

Further complicating things is the emotional and spiritual investment you undoubtedly put into saving yourself for your future mate.

I just found out that my boyfriend of almost two years had a sexual relationship with a girl about two years before we met.


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